One of the things adjectives (yes, it makes the transition into an adjective just fine) that Robin and I always use to describe the congregation we met and fell in love in (Grace Covenant Church) is “Family”; one of the things that made it very hard for us to venture out and plug into a new congregation when the Lord was shaking us up was an obvious lack of the same in so many congregations.

Don’t get me wrong.  This is not a “we’re better than you” judgement.  It is just an observation and a “putting into words” of what so many believers around the country describe when speaking of their “churches” and their communities.  The Church has really been trying (and has been very successful in the last 10 years) to establish “communities”.  They base their programs and outreaches and home groups around common interests and even needs, and they really make a point to create small groups of believers with nice, clean authority structures - that have nice, clean teachings, and nice, clean meetings.  But, so many are still incredibly empty in relationships - real… Family… relationships.

The Lord has really been reminding me, and stretching me in this for the last several months, and it became the real focus of our time with Ben & Robin Pasley (100 Portraits / Enter the Worship Circle) this weekend.  I got the title of this article from some improv that Ben & Robin did at a house concert a couple of weeks ago that they posted on their website.  Check it out here: 100 Portraits Improv on the topic at a recent house show.

“For though you might have ten thousand instructors in Christ, yet you do not have many fathers; for in Christ Jesus I have begotten you through the gospel. Therefore I urge you, imitate me. ” 1 Corinthians 4:15-16

We need Pauls for our Timothys.  We need to BE a Paul to a Timothy (or two, or ten).  But, man, guys - I am still really messed up.  I don’t treat my bride and my children like I think a healthy Christ-like husband and father should all of the time.  I’m sure I still have all kinds of doctrinal issues, and emotional issues, and wounds that I really don’t want to infect anyone else with.  But Fatherhood is one of the key answers to the emptiness present in our literal families (FIRST) and our church bodies.  It is also one of the keys to seeing the great end-time harvest, and one of the only means by which many will be protected from the great falling away:

“The hearts of the fathers turned to the children, and the hearts of the children turned to their fathers.”

“And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers,
for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ,
till we all come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a perfect man, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ; that we should no longer be children, tossed to and fro and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, in the cunning craftiness of deceitful plotting, but, speaking the truth in love, may grow up in all things into Him who is the head–Christ–
from whom the whole body, joined and knit together by what every joint supplies, according to the effective working by which every part does its share, causes growth of the body for the edifying of itself in love.”  (Ephesians 4:11-16)

It is time for the Fathers to “do their share”, and for The Family to get “joined and knit together” so that we may grow and be built-up in love “by what every joint supplies”.  It’s time for us to get past “community with a little ‘c’ and invest ourselves in Family with a big ‘F’” to take from what Ben Pasley sang so eloquently.  This goes far beyond just are local congregations, but, that’s a good place to start.

Who are you joined to in the Family of saints? Who are you joined and submitted to as fathers/mothers… really… like they’re really ‘watching over your soul’? Who are you ‘watching over’?  And, if you’re in the office of “pastor”, who are you REALLY fathering - not just teaching.  Are you promoting “community” or “Family”?

And, PLEASE, this isn’t one of those “let’s pray for strategy so we can devise a program to resolve fatherlessness” type things.  Just pray about one person or couple (at first) that the Lord would have you invest some of your life into - and start doing it.  Maybe I will, too. 

Fellow Christians:

You DO NOT have the right perform “a special” on Sunday morning.
You DO NOT have the right to be invited to that leadership meeting even though you know you are very leader-like.
You DO NOT have the right to be recognized for your wonderful service this year with the <whatever>.
You DO NOT have the right to be on the worship team, ministry team, etc.
You DO NOT have the right to be invited to “the Joneses” after church this Sunday - or next Sunday, even though they consistently invite other people in your congregation.
You DO NOT have the right to be in that clique with all of those recognized “spiritual” types.
You DO NOT have the right to have the right of freedom of religion, or of speech, or even to vote.
You DO NOT have the right to be “offended”… ever.

You DO have the right to be persecuted.
You DO have the right to forgive those who persecute or offend you (knowingly or not).

Enjoy your new found freedoms, because truly, in those two rights, you will find an amazing amount of freedom.

However, I also plead to “the Joneses” and the rest in the words of Jesus, The Word of God:

• “woe to that man by whom the offense comes” (Matthew 18:7)
• “and they devoted themselves to…the fellowship…and were together, and had all things in common… and broke bread from house to house” (Acts 2:42-47)
• “And those [members] of the body, which we think to be less honourable, upon these we bestow more abundant honour; and our uncomely [parts] have more abundant comeliness.” (1 Corinthians 12:23)
• “Blessed are you when they revile and persecute you, and say all kinds of evil against you falsely for My sake…” (Matthew 5:11)
• “But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward have you? Do not even the tax collectors do the same?” (Matthew 5:44-46)
• “I do not pray for these alone, but also for those who will believe in Me through their word; that they all may be one, as You, Father, are in Me, and I in You; that they also may be one in Us, that the world may believe that You sent Me.” (John 17:20-21)
• “By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.” (John 13:35)

Let us love each other, trying not to offend, forgiving those that do (even if they don’t ask or think they’re wrong), and be hospitable and selfless in all that we have - drawing closer and closer into complete unity - so that the world will believe.

This weekend I posted something that apparently lacked some clarity and resulted in a firestorm of misunderstanding that really pained my heart and frustrated my mind.  I think it was a good thing for me, though.  It exposed a few things to me: a little bit of pride, and a little bit of hypocrisy.

Before I was living for the Lord, I took great delight in trying to make christians feel dumb.  I believed in the Trinity.  I believe the Bible was the infalible word of God.  I believed that the church (as I has experience it) was a political, hypocritical mess that was nothing like Jesus - so I studied the Word, not with the “open mind” that our culture tries to put so much value on, but with the purpose of finding things I could use against christians.

On the other side, I was very big into music and the local music scene, which was dominated by punk rock.  The kind of punk rock that hated all other types of music, hated religion, hated any type of conformity, hated politicians - well… it hated.  Although I shared I similar hatred for conformity, I also felt the need to go-out-of-my-way to demonstrate the fact that I didn’t care about what people thought of my style of dress, hair, music, etc.  So much so that I even took delight in pointing out the differences between myself and this punk culture.

 One time while doing a sound check between bands at an underground punk club in Fort Smith (”The Old 700 Club”), I said from the microphone,

“I want to be different just like you guys.”
I then expounded,
“If you refuse to wear Guess, Varnet, Reebok, or Swatch,” (I’m aging myself), “just because ‘the preps’ wear them - you are letting them control you… they’re actually controlling what you wear and don’t wear… think about it.”

I probably didn’t make any friends that day, nor did I get any applause for my brief flicker as a Punk Philosopher.

I guess I say all of that to illustrate the fact that I am just like those punks.  In my consciousness of making sure I was “so different” that people had to respect and notice that I truly was a non-conformist, my actions were being ruled by pride, and by what other people thought about me.

When the firestorm erupted this weekend, and I was getting acused of all kinds of things that are completely against my real heart, it frustrated my mind and hurt my pride long before it broke my heart.  I have worked so hard to make sure people knew (especially youth and young adults) that I absolutely was not the stereotypical, hypocritical, judgemental, holier-than-thou christian.  Yet, in one crazy misunderstanding, I was being branded as one by an entire scene in my own hometown.  While struggling with how I could possibly convince people of my real heart, and how what they were saying was completely out-of-whack with what I had actually said or meant, I realized, “I’m not really trying to clear this up so that one day I can be an effective witness to them,” or anything lovely and spiritual like that.  I realized that I was trying to clear it up because I couldn’t stand the thought that someone might not like me - multiplied exponentially by the fact that it was over something that wasn’t even true.

So, although I did feel completely compelled to apologize and try to make amends, I did so out of just feeling the need to do so out of decency, because I had to first come to grips with my thoughts about these words of Jesus:

“You will be persecuted for My name’s sake.  Because they hate Me, they will hate you.”

The reason they were able to misinterpret what I said so readily is because they were judging me because I bear the name “Christian”.  And, even though I am not the stereotypically christian they have come to know and hate; and even though the Christ himself is not at all what they think or see personified in most american christians… I cannot worry about people liking me or accepting me - even the people that I feel the most connection and similarities with.  I wouldn’t care if it was some mainly denominational First Socio-Political Church of Your Hometown that was hating on me; but when it’s the people that the Lord has wired me to love and connect with, and used as a part of my very fashioning and molding for His purposes in my life - it destroyed me.

So, here I am - a little smaller than I was last week.

Thank you, Lord - for I must decrease so that You may increase.

Who hasn’t heard the time-honored descriptions of grace and mercy where grace is “getting what you do not deserve” and mercy is “not getting what you do deserve”… The Lord has given me such a new, active, and alive definition for grace that is so obvious it will just make you sick.

It is no secret that the doctrine of grace taught by the modern american church has been so often perverted into a “license to fail”.  This license to fail has been extended into almost every aspect of daily christian living, from the depths of lasciviousness (lustful desires) to spiritual disciplines such as fasting.  I’ve often heard this described as “greasy grace”.  This is not the grace of which the Bible speaks.

“So, Aaron, are you saying that God doesn’t have grace for us when we fail at these things?”

Yes, that is exactly what I’m saying… but, He does have plenty of mercy.  There is nothing or no one in all of creation that has mercy so vast, just, and everlasting.  The thing about mercy is, it requires judgement before it can even be called mercy.  The good thing is, the Lord disciplines those He loves - and His mercies are new every morning.  But I digress from grace.

Check this out… Meditate on it… and I pray you’ll be Empowered by it…

Grace is the ability to do what we could normally not do on our own.  Grace is the enabler to live humbly.  Grace is the power to live a righteous life here on the earth.  Grace is the discipline (and lightening of hunger pains) to succeed on a fast.

Grace is the Lord’s preemptive power to succeed.  It comes in before we fail, and gives us the ability to do what is right.

I encourage you to do a search for the word ”grace” and replace it with something like “preemptive power to succeed”.  Out of the 137 verses that I’ve looked at so far (in the NKJV), there’s only been one or two where it was even a little hard to see it make perfect sense in place of our traditional view of ”grace equals mercy”.  And, even in that one, “justified freely by His grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus”, it could very well fit when we think of other verses such that describe our present-day salvation as a daily process of working it out, from glory to glory, etc… so that we are “justified freely by the power that He gives us to walk rightly through the process of redemption that is in Christ Jesus.”

Even when I look at the definition of the original greek word charis, I at first wanted to think that it didn’t really fit - and being one who feels VERY called to “watch my life and doctrine closely”, I wanted to shy away from documenting this revelation.  But, even charis, in its tense and definition speaks of “that which affords”, and “merciful kindness by which God turns us”.  It’s there.  Where has it been hiding all of my life?  And, by looking at it in these terms, in nullifies the dangerous and false doctrine of free licensure to sin.  It puts the responsibility back in our court, at least enough to confirm that we ARE expected to “be holy as He is holy” because He will give us the ability to do just that if we will humble ourselves and ask Him for that ability.

You can see it again in the Lord’s prayer.  Jesus teaches the disciples to ask preemptively to avoid sin, and then if they are caught, to ask for the power to overcome it in advance.  “Do not lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.”  I don’t know about you, but I’d rather that the first part of that prayer come true more often than the need for the second part.  But I’ll take both.

So, what are you waiting for?  Let’s start asking for more grace, so we’ll need less mercy… okay, well, you know what I’m saying.